I’m approaching retirement, but I feel like I should just work, work, work. Why do I feel like I’ve never done enough?

Claire!
I feel like I’m in your same position. My husband plays golf. I watch old movies.
Unfortunately, we’re in Texas. I feel like if we moved to Oregon where our son lives, I’d have more like minded people to do things with like hiking. Our daughter who lives close by tells me my problems won’t be solved just by moving.

I know this was posted several years ago, but I feel exactly as you feel…lost and alone. I’ve been retired since 2020 when COVID a was in full swing, and there was no “active” world to retire into; everything was shut down and virtual classes and communication were the new normal. As an adult with no children, I have few good friends and they’re scattered everywhere, my siblings, too. It was “ok” during COVID because everyone was in the same boat, but restrictions have been lifted, and I’m acutely aware that I’m on my own. I’m married and we love each other, but we have separate interests and that is more obvious now that we’re both home all day. Even where we decided to settle after retirement is a topic of debate. What I crave, he doesn’t care about, and what he desires is not on my Top 5 list of must-haves in terms of community. We have no plans to separate because we love each other and like each other, but we can’t find a common interest. Meeting new people when in your late-60s and 70s (unless a member of a church) is difficult. We’re spiritual but not religious, so to join a church for social reasons is unfair and hypocritical. I binge watch favorite shows, he plays online cribbage with strangers. If this is retirement, I’d rather work until the day I die.

I had the same feeling about leaving an unreasonable work load for others to pick up. There is a hiring freeze. However, I did not want to live through even one more month of the stress. It is damaging to health, and I have to take care of that or there is nothing.

look I was in the same boat as you worked bloody hard as an Adult Social worker high case load, no consistent manager, 4 restructures putting in to keeping my job. Hot desking to the point I did not know what floor I was working on let alone who I may recognize! I retired early at 55 more out of concern with issues relating to my mother’s memory and health. I went with my gut and am glad I did as my mother’s health decline, and she died within 5 years. I’m so glad I did not have the worry of work and don’t regret my actions. Sure, I get bored at times and miss company, but I know my field of work has not improved and thank God I am solvent. I don t think my pipe dream of a job not for salary but for being appreciated exists in most people’s work life, but I envy those that have

And now I guess I can consider myself more like a “seasoned veteran” at retirement than over a year ago. I feel like I still have a lot of learning to do. I feel mixed about retirement. The financial strain gets to me the most followed by boredom. But the positive side of it is being able to do what I want and not have office politics to put up with. For some reason, everything I have moments of memories about in all of the jobs I had, they all are unpleasant.

Dear Annette:

I have the same issue, but its mixed. My retiring will inconvenience the department I’m working for, but they don’t really appreciate many of the things I have done for them over the years which they take for granted , and they have advanced others at my level but not given me those same opportunities. I do feel rather guilty nevertheless, like I’m throwing away a well-paying job with benefits– but I’m simply exhausted. I’m 68 years old and I would like to relax and enjoy my life going forward for a change. I definitely , definitely can relate to your view and situation–