by Joe Hearn | Apr 1, 2013 | Lifestyle Design, Pursuits
Have you ever looked back on pictures of a younger you and said something like, “Where did the time go?” Why does time often feel so fleeting? More importantly, is there anything we can do to slow it down? How can we keep life from feeling like such a vapor? I’ve been spending some time thinking about that lately. So far I’ve come up with three things.
Don’t procrastinate—Think back to school. Did you ever wait to study for a test or write a paper until the night before it was due? Whenever I did that, I got the sense that it had snuck up on me. When I first got the assignment, it felt like I had plenty of time. No need to rush. Other things were more urgent. And then all of a sudden “plenty of time” turned into “now or never.” What happened?
When you procrastinate, the passage of time becomes a nagging reminder that there is much left undone; that most of your dreams are still on the drawing board. When your time gets short and your To-do list stays long, the time flies by.
When you actually DO stuff, however, your To-do list is shrinking right along with your remaining time. You don’t get that same feeling of rushed panic (at least not to the same degree). Yes the time went by, but you used it wisely. If you spend your life saying “Someday,” I suspect you will reach the end with an overwhelming sense that it went by too fast. Don’t wait for someday. Someday is here.
Break routine—I’ve mentioned before that we have a goal of getting out daughter to all 50 states before she graduates from high school. A few weeks ago we went to St. Louis, Missouri (otherwise known as state #17).
It wasn’t a major trip, but we had a fun time. We found several great restaurants, visited the Arch, went to the City Museum (probably the coolest “museum” in the United States) and had a fun time hanging out as a family.
Had we stayed home and done the same old thing that we do every weekend, I would have forgotten about it by Monday. But we did something different. Something out of the ordinary. And because of that, all three of us will likely never forget that weekend. We’ll always have those shared memories, stories and photographs.
To keep time from flying by, break up your routine. If you go through life doing the same thing, day in and day out, there won’t be much to remember. It will seem like the same day lived over and over. Life will seem so short because it won’t be packed with memories. But if you make sure to periodically do interesting and out of the ordinary things, your life will seem long and full. As I have said before, focus on milestones instead of maintenance.
Do less—At first, doing less might seem like a counterintuitive way to have a fuller life, but stick with me for a second. If you pack your schedule with too much, you don’t have time to savor life. It’s the difference between enjoying a nice meal with friends and competing in a hot dog eating contest. In one you have a chance to enjoy the food and engage in interesting conversation. In the other you’re trying to shove in as much as you can as fast as you can. You might end up eating more in the hot dog eating contest, but you will also end up enjoying it less. Unfortunately, many of us (e.g. me) live our lives like it’s a hot dog eating contest. We’re trying to shove in as much as possible. There’s a fine line between living a full life and cramming so much stuff in that you feel rushed and can’t enjoy it. Beware of the busy virus. Simplify.
Have a great week. Make it interesting!
~ Joe
by Joe Hearn | Feb 22, 2013 | Lifestyle Design, Pursuits, Retirement
Note: Welcome to all the new readers who found us from the article I did at MarketWatch this week. I’m glad to have you on board. In today’s post I’m sharing that article with IR readers, so sorry if you’ve already seen it.
I have always looked up to Theodor Geisel, better known to millions as Dr. Seuss. As a writer myself, one of the qualities I admire most was his ability to take complex ideas (e.g. learning to read, racial equality, materialism) and make them engaging and easy to understand for readers (e.g. The Cat in the Hat, The Sneetches, How the Grinch Stole Christmas).
Having read a biography on Seuss, I knew that his birthday was just around the corner (March 2), which got me thinking: If Seuss were still with us, how might he have used his considerable talents to explain a complicated and sometimes boring topic like retirement planning?
Of course we’ll never know, but I thought I’d use his rhyming and poetic meter as inspiration and take a stab at it myself. The result is the poem below called ‘Someday’ is Here!
‘Someday’ is Here! [Click here for an illustrated version]
Finally!
You’ve made it.
After 40 years and a day
Of working and toiling and slaving away.
You’ve got money in the bank
And time on your hands
Now is the time to make some great plans.
There’s only on problem
A big concern, really.
If you want a great life then you really must hurry.
You see, all these years
You’ve heard experts opining
That your primary worry should be money and timing.
Those are vital, for sure.
But, take care to remember
If life were a calendar
You’d be in September.
The clock keeps on ticking
It gets louder each year.
You’ve spent years saying “Someday”
Well, “Someday” is here.
It’s time to stop dreaming
And actually DO.
That is my primary advice for you.
So how does one start?
Where to begin?
Grab a pencil and paper and let’s jump right in.
The first thing to do is to ask yourself this:
What types of things bring retirement bliss?
Don’t try to please others.
We’re talking about you.
What is it that YOU’VE always wanted to do?
Maybe that’s travel or volunteering to help others.
What would it be if you had your druthers?
Once you know that, then you’re well on your way.
But there are a few other things I should probably say.
First, don’t forget friends.
In life they’re the glue.
They hold everything together.
Otherwise it’s just you.
And while friends are important,
Don’t forget about your spouse.
If you’re happy together
You’ll have no reason to grouse.
So work on your friendships and marriage for sure.
What else? Let me think?
There are two or three more.
Oh yes. Now with plans and people in order
You can shift your attention and start to re-order.
Your priorities that is. Your To-Do list is jumbled.
With all sorts of things you should probably fumble.
Get rid of the extra and purge the redundant.
Once you do that life will be more abundant.
So that’s a few things that will get you ahead.
But remember, they won’t help a bit if you’re dead.
So get yourself healthy and lose the spare tire.
If you need a few pointers, call your doc and inquire.
Before we wrap up, a quick review.
What are the things you really MUST do?
Have money and plans. Relationships too.
A good healthy body and priorities not askew.
Do each of those things and you’ll be ahead by a mile.
Because those are the things that make retirement worthwhile.
[Click here for an illustrated version of the poem.]
Enjoy your weekend!
Joe
I originally published this article at MarketWatch.
by Joe Hearn | Feb 13, 2013 | Lifestyle Design, Pursuits, Travel
It may seem counterintuitive, but spending your money can help you be a better saver. Let me show you what I mean.
How successful would Olympians be if the Olympics were held every 40 years instead of every 4? Not very, right? Most athletes would burn out long before they made it to the actual competition. That’s because it’s impossible to always be in “preparation” mode without experiencing some sort of “payoff.” For athletes, the training and sacrifice needs to be counterbalanced by cheering crowds and medal stands.
Relating that to retirement planning, it’s tough to sacrifice, save and be disciplined with your planning decade after decade without having some sort of payoff along the way. I don’t think it’s a coincidence that Americans work longer and take fewer vacation days than almost any other developed country and we’re also woefully underprepared for retirement. We’re asking people to be all wind up and no pitch.
Taking a break can remind you why you’re saving in the first place. After spending a little time at the beach or touring around Europe you might find yourself saying “I could get used to this.” When you get a taste of the reward, you’ll probably be more likely to put in the effort.
So take that vacation. Have a little fun and enjoy life now. It will probably give you the incentive you need to save for the long haul.
Incidentally, I try to eat my own cooking here at IR. The photo in today’s post is the sunrise in the Cayman Islands last week. I finished up the test I mentioned in the last post (I passed!) and got on a plane the next day for a trip with some friends. After a week of 80 degree weather, sand volleyball and scuba, one of the first things I did when I got back was to increase my 401(k) contributions. 🙂
Have a great week!
Joe
by Joe Hearn | Dec 7, 2012 | Lifestyle Design, Pursuits
I was looking at my calendar the other day and it’s loaded with things like meetings, lunches, conference calls, article deadlines and doctor/dentist appointments. I put those things on my calendar for one very important reason: If it’s on my calendar, it gets done.
If I schedule a meeting, I’m there five minutes early. If I have a lunch appointment with you, don’t expect to get stood up. If I tell my trainer I’ll be there at 4 o’clock on Monday, Wednesday and Friday, then the gym bag is packed and in the car on those days.
I’m sure I’m not alone in this. Most people are disciplined with the things on their calendar. As I thought about that, it occurred to me: Why don’t we schedule our fun stuff? Too often in life we have hopes, plans and dreams that we want to pursue, but they get crowded out by the tyranny of the urgent. In a cruel bit of cognitive dissonance, we pack our schedules with all the things that we HAVE to do, and then try to fit the things that we WANT to do somewhere in the cracks.
What if you started scheduling the good stuff? What if you actually blocked out time on your calendar for a date night with your spouse, time with your kids, time to read, time to learn a new hobby, time to go for a walk or time to take a trip? My guess is that if it was on your calendar, you’d treat it like all of your other appointments and actually show up to do it. Not only that, but you would gradually get better at using your time to accomplish the things that you wanted to in life, which is a skill that will come in handy during retirement.
Year End Review
While we’re on the topic of using our time wisely, I wanted to point you to a few articles in the Intentional Retirement Archives. As many of you know, I spend time each December thinking about the past year and planning for the next. You can read about the process I use in these two articles:
I’d encourage you to set aside some time this month to think about the coming year. Whether you follow my process or create one of your own, don’t underestimate the importance of planning. The type of life you want to live—one filled with meaning, accomplishment, and purpose—does not happen by accident. You need to be intentional.
Have a great weekend!
~ Joe
by Joe Hearn | Nov 28, 2012 | Happiness, Lifestyle Design, Pursuits, Work
Late last month an advertising executive (a real life Mad Man) named Linds Redding died of esophageal cancer. After being diagnosed in 2011, he would regularly write about the disease, his treatments and his thoughts on life at his blog.
Earlier this year he wrote a post called A Short Lesson in Perspective in which he reflected on how wholeheartedly he had thrown himself into his career over the years. As he rapidly approached the premature end of his life, he wondered aloud if it was worth it.
His insights and conclusions were so raw and honest that I wanted to excerpt a small portion of his post below so that you and I could reflect on our own priorities as we live life and plan for retirement. One day (hopefully not soon) we will be where Linds was when he wrote that essay. How great would it be if we could heed his words of warning so we could look back on our life with pride, satisfaction and few regrets?
A quick note: Linds refers to something called “The Overnight Test.” When creating advertising campaigns, he and his team would often let ideas simmer overnight. If it still seemed like a good idea the next day, they would say that it passed “The Overnight Test.”
From A Short Lesson in Perspective:
“Countless late nights and weekends, holidays, birthdays, school recitals and anniversary dinners were willingly sacrificed at the altar of some intangible but infinitely worthy higher cause. It would all be worth it in the long run…
This was the con. Convincing myself that there was nowhere I’d rather be was just a coping mechanism. I can see that now. It wasn’t really important. Or of any consequence at all really. How could it be? We were just shifting product. Our product, and the clients. Just meeting the quota. Feeding the beast as I called it on my more cynical days.
So was it worth it?
Well of course not. It turns out it was just advertising. There was no higher calling. No ultimate prize. Just a lot of faded, yellowing newsprint, and old video cassettes in an obsolete format I can’t even play any more even if I were interested. Oh yes, and a lot of framed certificates and little gold statuettes. A shit-load of empty Prozac boxes, wine bottles, a lot of grey hair and a tumor of indeterminate dimensions.
It sounds like I’m feeling sorry for myself again. I’m not. It was fun for quite a lot of the time. I was pretty good at it. I met a lot of funny, talented and clever people, got to become an overnight expert in everything from shower-heads to sheep-dip, got to scratch my creative itch on a daily basis, and earned enough money to raise the family which I love, and even see them occasionally.
But what I didn’t do, with the benefit of perspective, is anything of any lasting importance. At least creatively speaking. Economically I probably helped shift some merchandise. Enhanced a few companies bottom lines. Helped make one or two wealthy men a bit wealthier than they already were.
As a life, it all seemed like such a good idea at the time.
But I’m not really sure it passes The Overnight Test.”
by Joe Hearn | Nov 9, 2012 | Happiness, Pursuits, Risk
I recently had a friend who quit his job after working there for almost 20 years. When I asked him why he said, “I had just gotten too comfortable.”
Too comfortable?! Is there such a thing? After all, isn’t that what we’re all striving for? What’s wrong with being too comfortable?
As I thought about it, I think I caught his meaning. For him, comfort had become risky because:
- It was sapping his drive and motivation
- It was keeping him from taking risks
- It was making him lazy and fearful of change
- It was causing him to give up on certain dreams
He had a stable income and a warm bed, but he was starting to feel stuck and stagnate. He was comfortable, but he wasn’t feeling particularly fulfilled. Not only that, but he was afraid to do anything about it for fear that things would get uncomfortable.
Have you ever felt that way? I have. Comfort is nice, but it can be dangerous if it leaves you feeling overly content. That’s because contentment demands little. It steers you into a rut that can be hard to get out of.
This comfort paradox can be especially worrisome as we get close to retirement. Why? Comfort is often a by-product of successful retirement planning (e.g. no job, financial independence, etc.). In some ways that can be good. After all, who wants to be worried about where your next meal is going to come from or how you’re going to pay the electric bill.
Unfortunately, it can be bad too. First of all, retirement is a major transition and transitions can be uncomfortable. You’re leaving a job and a routine you’ve know for decades. You’re dealing with unfamiliar things like Medicare and Social Security. You may be moving to a new house or a new city. Being too focused on comfort can cause you to make decisions during that transition that favor short-term comfort over long-term good.
Second, retirement is the time to make your plans and dreams a reality. That means you’ll be doing new things, visiting unfamiliar places and meeting new people. To make that happen, you can’t be content to sit back and play defense.
In other words, both the transition into retirement and your lifestyle in retirement require you to get out of your comfort zone. There needs to be a tension between your desire for comfort and your desire to strive for more. If your primary goal is comfort, don’t expect great things. If, however, your primary goals are growth, fulfillment and personal satisfaction, then you can expect a remarkable retirement, but you can also expect to be a bit uncomfortable in the process.
~ Joe
Photo by Becky McCray. Used under Creative Commons License.
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